Juan Dixon Motherfucker

The Wizards signed Juan Dixon.  I'm so fucking happy.  Juan Dixon is my favorite basketball player of all time, my email is freaking jdixonfan@gmail.com.  This can only mean good things for the Wiz, as Juan is basically a more refined version of Roger Mason, Jr.  I expect big things from him this year

David Needs To Make A Post

The title says it all.  Two posts.  Really?  You're the one with the journalistic background (even though I'm still probably a better writer).  So...write something now.  I believe you promised us all a drunken Gilbert rant like last Tuesday.  Fucking write something now.  Bitch.

Jerry Jones Is A Little Bitch

I think we can all agree on this.  Jerry Jones can go suck a dick.  All he does is bitch about everything, most recently Ed Hochuli, while his team sucks ass.  I really hope the next time Hochuli is doing a Cowboys game Romo gets paralyzed and he calls nothing, maybe that will teach Jerry to stop bitching about him calling so many penalties.

Suck it Jerry.

Jerry Jones Is A Little Bitch

I think we can all agree on this.  Jerry Jones can go suck a dick.  All he does is bitch about everything, most recently Ed Hochuli, while his team sucks ass.  I really hope the next time Hochuli is doing a Cowboys game Romo gets paralyzed and he calls nothing, maybe that will teach Jerry to stop bitching about him calling so many penalties.

Suck it Jerry.

Daily Gamecock: On The Move

Arenas Undergoes Knee Surgery...Again

Fuck.  Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.  Why the fuck does this always happen?  Gilbert Arenas had knee surgery again, making it clear that he is becoming our answer to Grant Hill.  This is fucking killing me, what happens if he's not the same when he comes back?  He looked like a toned down version of himself in the playoffs this year, showing flashes of brilliance but ultimately looking like just your average player.  It's looking like we may need to change our Big Three to Caron, Antawn, and DeShawn if Gilbert can't stay away from the knife.

Late To Bed Early To Rise Makes A Man Want To Gouge Out His Eyes

Fuck me.  I'm just going to bed and I have a 9 am class which I have to wake up at 7:30 for since it's a 20 minute walk away.  Seriously, check it out.  I want to kill myself.  Anyone interested in assisting me send me an email and you can travel down to Columbia and I'll sign you into my dorm and we can figure something out.

Good night everyone, be back in about 3 hours I guess.

Palin's a joke

McCain is shooting himself in the foot in the long run with his VP pick.  Yes, Palin is a smart woman, a great story,and definitely brings the spotlight to his campaign for now.  But let’s be real. She has even less experience than Obama.  She's been a governor for all of 2 years, and what qualified her for that position, the fact that she was a mayor of a town of 9,000? She's going to look foolish debating a hard-hitting guy as bright, informed and well versed in foreign policy as Joe Biden is.  Eventually people are going to be asking themselves "Is this woman really ready to be one heart attack away from the presidency?" And John McCain will be 72 at the time he would take office, which would make him the oldest president ever, even older than Reagan.  His need for a trustworthy replacement in the event of sickness is a sad reality of old age that he needs to face.

To go with the campaign cliché, it's a maverick pick by McCain, no doubt.  He took a risk by picking someone fairly inexperienced in order to appeal to the Hillary fanbase.  Will it work in the long term? Doubtful. Liberal females won’t see any merit in supporting a woman who doesn't support woman's rights such as abortion.

 

Speaking of abortion, you can expect that issue to come back into the spotlight again now that we know Palin's 17-year-old daughter is pregnant.  Obviously she's keeping the baby, which is commendable.  But this will make Palin a 44-year-old grandmother, and the first GMILF I've ever come across. Also keep in mind that as VP, she won’t exactly be giving her one-year- old special needs kid her undivided attention.  I’m not sure what the family values conservatives will think of that.  Maybe the recent emergence of her evangelical image is the GOP’s way of keeping that part of the base happy.

Overall, Palin's a joke of a VP pick.  The McCain camp wants to convince you that she's  been disrespected. But people have every right to bash her for being an insane religious nutcase, especially when running for office in a country that’s supposed to separate religion and state. We have a right to hate on her for dismissing the realities of global warming.  We have a right to call her out for having zero international experience. She's a joke in the context of what she would bring to Washington and to be honest, has little to no business making political decisions, period.  

But does any of this really matter? Of course not, because Palin is the type of figure that the media craves, just like Obama was. She’s different; she’s exciting. The Democrats strategy should now be to bring some of the focus back to McCain, even if they can't change the fact that the spotlight is always going to be on Palin to a certain extent.  And as long as that's true, the Obama camp needs to keep working to put that "nutcase" label on her.  Elections are all about image. Even though Palin shouldn't be a major player in all of this, the reality is that she changes the image of the Republican ticket.  It would be irresponsible for Democrats not to attack her and change the way the public perceives her.

--posted by Dave

Erin Andrews vs. Jenn Sterger

Ah, the age old question.  If it has boobs, can it still be a relevant sideline reporter?  Well, both Erin Andrews and Jenn Sterger have attempted to answer this question for us over the last couple of years.  So, who really is sports' sweetest girl?  Let's find out...

Bias

People have accused Erin of being overly biased towards Florida and especially QB Tim Tebow.  But to be fair, who isn't in love with Tim Tebow?  He's so dreamy, I'd fuck him.  And this is coming from a South Carolina student.  On the other hand, Jenn went to Free Shoes University and wrote a ridiculous biased preview of the horrible Jets on Deadspin.

Advantage: Erin

Outfit

Jenn dresses like a slut, while Erin dresses much more classily.  I'm not really sure who wins here, but I will be excusing myself for a couple of minutes...

Advantage: Neither

Professionalism

Jenn called Erin out once and quickly apologized for it.  Erin was also called out by Mike Nadel for flirting with players, but he's the only one complaining.

Advantage: Erin

Body

Jenn has bigger boobs, they both have great asses.

Advantage: Jenn

Face

Erin is much cuter, I will not accept arguments stating otherwise.

Advantage: Erin

Molestability

As the clip evidences, Erin wins.

Advantage: Erin

Most Likely to Get Brent Musburger Wet

Since Brent and Erin have had to work together none of this is allowed.

Advantage: Jenn

Personality

I have never met Jenn, but she seems really slutty and kind of trashy.  I met Erin after the USC-NC State game and she was really nice in the brief conversation we had.

Advantage: Erin

Overall Winner: Erin

So there you have it, Erin is America's sweetheart.  Image at the top from Deadspin.

A more polite welcome

Hey, I'm Dave and I'm pretty much here to add some journalistic credibility and a (slightly) more mature tone to the blog.   Basically what you can expect from us to speak our minds on sports, music, politics, and pop culture.....whatever comes to our twisted and perverted minds at the moment.  We will do our best to be more than a rambling list of YouTube videos and links to Deadspin and other "real" blogs, but then again, we know that's what you want to read.  Anyway, bear with us as we figure out what the hell we want this thing to be.  We hope that eventually you can walk away from this site feeling somewhat comfortable with the fact that you wasted 5 potentially productive minutes of your day reading dick jokes and kindergarden-level humor.  Peace.

Rant: New Facebook

Alright does anyone else use Facebook?  How much do you fucking hate the new Facebook?  It's the gayest shit ever right?  Why the fuck change something that's so good?  I will never understand this.  I guess that's what we get for putting all our trust in a douchebag from Harvard.  The only way this would be worse would be if fucking Mark Zuckerberg had went to Duke.  Then Facebook would be only for white people and would rape you when you went to sleep.

The Banks Are Failing And I Don't Give A Fuck

Because I have all my money in Wachovia and Chevy Chase bitches.  That's what you get for putting your faith in someone named Lehman.  Haven't you learned anything from Tom Lehman's career?  I have no pity for you fucker.  And neither would 2pac if he were alive.

And yes, I know I'm an asshole you don't have to write that at the bottom.

Later.

The Opening

The first post.

This is a blog by two college freshman (One from USC, the other from Emory) about anything.  Right now it seems boring as fuck I know, but I swear to Allah it will get much better.  It's fucking 1:12 AM in Columbia and I'm tired, stop expecting good things from me.  Basically...this will sound like two college kids talking, so it WILL be offensive.  But we're not putting the adult content warning cause that's annoying as fuck.

Oh yeah, we will be occasionally having posts from another freshman at Penn State who used to gang-bang in Compton.  Fun shit.

Anyway, have fun reading it and SUCK A DICK.

Peace.